*This noon I want to buy some gifts for Dear cousin to make her happy. It was a big shop full of books, cassetes, toys & everytihng for kids that I haven't entered before to see what they have to sell. I'd always just passed. I want in today...

Walking among that toys & colorful books full of pictures & nold notes, I remembered my childhood & my color pencils, painting books & everything me & my sister had to play with & have fun.

I bought 3-4 books, a puzzle & some pencils.. When I got home called dear uncle to say we were going to the hospital.
He sounded so delighted: I'm taking her home.
I was over the moon. Hospital is hospital! even a smart & clean one. These day when grandma & then dear cousin went to hospital, I feel so odd. When I want to nag about sth. I remember my health & thank God but I nag after it! I won't have a healthy heart this way in 3-4 years. I'll go to heaven to see my ancestors because all of them have had heart attcks except the ones who didn't want others to complain of their long life. So they died! :D

*Me: Tell me what's on your mind..
You smile & answer: "Nothing"..

- Sure? You are really different from what you try to seem & I can see this. Aren't you?
- Can you see my mind?

I reply "somehow" but the correct answer is: "I can read your body, especially your eyes. You can keep silent but can't stop looking deep into my eyes. Thta's nough for me to know what's on your mind. You know?
I love your shocked face babe.

*When we make friends, we say to ourselves: "We'll neer get out of touch."... but this happens to us again & again. Sometimes we get in touch with old friends but.. We make new friends & feel happy because of a short message from an old friend.. Absurd?

*Don't move! Don't move! Keep still!

*Do you know why some people smoke? For fun? I can see no fun in such a thing.
Cigarettes do a lot of harm. That's all.

*I'll make a complaint to God & will never get it to him.

*Why I can' t learn that when sb talks to me about a bad event in their life, I can say "Hard Luck"?

*There's a reality in my life which I haven't talked about if before!
I never say sth. like "Make yourself at home" to my guests & even if I do so, I don't really mean that. I'm used to behave somehow like a guest even in my grandma's house. I wash the dishes sometimes & do the laundry but I never feel I'm at home!

But I don't like others to have such a feeling & they don't of course! :p
So I'm a nice host & a bad guest. It's somehow odd! I'm somehow odd in fact.

*The more I review my "Elementary Vocabulary" book, the more I notice how forgetful & absent-minded I can be!
Now repeat after me:
When we write XOXO at the end of a letter or note, X means kiss & O means hug! Don't ask me why. I don't know really.

*Do I like to change my job?
well, yes & no! I'm not sure.
Sometimes I think all of us work for getting money & if we had enough money, so we'd have gone to work everyday.
The other pont is that we have'nt got any salary this year aleady!!! So the reason - at least for us - can't be just money.
Thank God all of them have their own houses & aren't hard up.
I'm so gald I have good friend there & I feel free & relaxed more or less & somehow to tell you the truth, I don't want to think about a really nice job with organized work time & good salary! but I don't know why I pretend to from time to time.

You know? I can't stand a formal place full of do's & don'ts!

*I don't want to study on & off anymore. There'll be no break from now on.

*AN! important thing in a reationship is to know your friends' likes & dislikes. You did't talk to me just because you wanted me as a friend & I wanted to know my new friend in return!
I can't understand why you refuse to reply any question about yourself but I want you to know I can't be a friend to a stranger...

*I've decided decided decided to write here again & don't leave it even for a short time bcz I think it's getting somehow difficult for me to remember words & expressions I knew someday & it's realy killing me.

So I started from reading sth. in english a few days ago which I saw on Zahra's blog. I took "when an iranian writes a letter in english" to the firm. The more I thought, the more I concolued that there's no one exept Mr. Polite & Mr. Talkative who can read the text & laugh to it & because I don't talk to Mr. Talkative that much, I went to Mr. Polite's room with a CD in my hand:

"I have sth. to show u for fun :D Read it now. I wanna see your reaction."
If I was in his shoes. I'd ask what? what is it? what's the matter? what reaction do u mean? but Mr. Polite didn't ask even a simple question, just accepted in silent & started to read.
I was watching his face & his pc's monitor..
At the beginning, he was smiling bcz I was grinning as if it was the first time that I was reading that funny letter but after 1 minute he started laughting. I get happy when he laughs, I don't know why exactly.

You know? Today I was somehow abnormal & everyone was hearing my laughter all day!

Today I read sth. else on Anonymous's blog & laughes a lot:

*God created the donkey and said to him.
"You will be a donkey. You will work un-tiringly from sunrise to sunset carrying burdens on your back. You will eat grass, you will have no intelligence and you will live 50 years."

The donkey answered: "I will be a donkey, but to live 50 years is much. Give me only 20 years."
God granted his wish.

God created the dog and said to him:
"You will guard the house of man. You will be his best Friend.
You will eat the scraps that he gives you and you will live 30 years.
You will be a dog."

The dog answered: "Sir, to live 30 years is too much,give me only 15 years."
God granted his wish.

God created the monkey and said to him:
"You will be a monkey. You will swing from branch to branch doing tricks.
You will be amusing and you will live 20 years. "

The monkey answered: "To live 20 years is too much, give me only 10 years."
God granted his wish.

Finally God created man ... and said to him:
"You will be man, the only rational creature on the face of the earth.

You will use your intelligence to become master over all the animals.
You will dominate the world and you will live 20 years."

Man responded: "Sir, I will be a man but to live only 20 years is very little, give me the 30 years that the donkey refused, the 15 years that the dog did not want and the 10 years the monkey refused."
God granted man's wish.

And since then, man lives 20 years as a man, marries and spends 30 years like a donkey, working and carrying all the burdens on his back.

Then when his children are grown, he lives 15 years like a dog taking care of the house and eating whatever is given to him, so that when he is old, he can retire and live 10 years like a monkey, going from house to house and from one son or daughter to another doing tricks to amuse his grandchildren.

That's Life. Isn't it?

* - Spell laught for me.
Dear sister: L-A-U-G-H

- Doesn't it have a T?
- No! Have u forgot words Maryam?

- hum? eeee, it's been my mistake for years. I don't know why I think laugh has a T! laught!!!! :D

*Piece of advice

There are always things to be worried about.
There are always reasons to feel bad.

If you look at your daily life, You can easily find them but they are not really there.
They appear to you because you want to see them.

Sometimes you have to simply ignore all memoirs of past ,Thoughts of present , Worries of future.
Human -brain has unlimited capabilities.